Overcoming Low Muscle Tone: Parents

To close the series on Overcoming Low Muscle Tone, I wanted to write a post about the indispensable role that the primary caregivers of the child play.

I'm not an expert on Low Muscle Tone. I'm not even a therapist, or a special teacher and actually I had never heard of Low Muscle Tone until the day I read the term online, when I was looking for answers to why Patrick wasn't crawling, rolling or pulling up. Being just shy of 4,000 hits on this blog, it makes me so happy to see that most of those hits are from Google searches on low muscle tone, hypotonia blog, oculomotor apraxia, afos for kids and so forth. This means, parents out there are looking for answers to their questions, and looking for ways to help their children, just like I'm. This is the very first step and most important one on helping your children. If the primary caregivers are determined to help the child overcome the obstacles, then he/she will overcome the obstacles.

I realize that in this series I missed out on mentioning so many toys that are specifically designed to help kids with low muscle tone. There are many exercises to do at home that I didn't list, and perhaps some specialists that are there to help hypotonic kids that I have never heard of. But the thing is, I'm writing our experience, I'm here to tell what we have done, and what has worked for us. Patrick's hypotonia wasn't severe, but it was still stopping him from developing at his friends' speed. Every single thing posted here, we did it, and that is why Patrick is now walking and running and jumping. So, you see, it's not about the doctor, or the therapist, or the toy, or the exercise, it is about all the things combined, that you, as parents, will do for your child.

My mother would say that ultimately Patrick's improvements are possible because of all the prayers. And she is probably right. Rather than praying for a miracle that one day Patrick will just wake up and will be capable of doing all the things kids his age do, we actually pray that God gives me and my husband the wisdom to know how to better help Patrick. We pray that we have easy access to the tools (doctors, recreational areas) that will help us help him. We pray for our patience, and our perseverance, and to never let our hope die, that one day, not long from now, Patrick will be able to close that gap of capabilities between him and kids his age.

As much as the Pediatrician loves children, or the special ed loves children, or the therapist loves children, no one loves your children more than you do. So nobody has the desire and love to help your child more than you do. One hour a week of physical therapy won't make the difference. Hypotonia is not a rare disorder, there is a lot of information out there, on websites, books, online groups... you don't need to spend too much time trying to figure out how to help your child. It's all at your fingertips. Reach out to services provided by your county, ask your doctor. Take your child to the playground and other outdoor activities. Host play dates, go to play dates. Make your partner involved. 

But, don't feel bad if you don't work with your child every single day. We have other things to do besides working with our hypotonic child. We have other children too, and a house to take care of, meals to make, and perhaps a job. And we get tired, too. So we need to rest. And we need to go out and have adult conversations with adults outside our jobs. And trust me, taking care of all that helps the hypotonic child as well. Because if you, the primary caregiver are fulfilling your needs and desires, your overall attitude is so positive, energetic and stress-free that therefore your are more able to fulfill your child's needs. Trust me, I know.

Take a break but don't lose sight of goal. That's what I'm trying to say here. Work with your child short, but often periods of time a week. Your consistency will make the difference, you will make the difference. Be your child's best advocate.